49

They thought it was a great idea for me to represent my client from a drive-in theater projector with matching white screen and broadcast it across the state. They had spent a lot of cold hard paper cash money to get this asshole to actually accept an attorney instead of representing themselves but that's just so they could run him through the assembly line. I had him plead "No Restroom Breaks" and he promptly shot himself in the face with a bow and arrow. 

And since I was never vaccinated against unchecked foreign agents and their pets, I was given contempt of court and was ordered to serve 10 days and was told to get in the jail. 

Of course it was pizza night, so we all sat around the Silverfish Ultra High Brightness LED TV and binge-watched "Asshole with an Empty Debit Card". You ever seen this? All he does is go around to grocery stores, fills up a couple carts, goes through the line, and stands there running the card until someone politely asks him to go away. Mesmerizing, I tell you. 

Glorious sleep came all to quickly.