The winter apocalypse has come and gone and now, many hours since, The Great Melt has begun. I took upon the neighborhoods in grief as every house began to awaken from its dark slumber. Slowly, trodging slowly in the cold, armed with a makeshift melee weapon consisting of a sharpened hubcap tied to a mop handle, the world began to reboot. I knew I would have to lose my animal skins and tarp for clothing and turn to traditional wear soon.
Regardless, school was cancelled. Not for me, though. I gathered the children in a group and fed them promises of glory and money and video game systems and sent them to their deaths by convincing them that every police car seen needs to be lifted and moved to the sea. I did this for no other reason other than to see if I could do it.
Eventually, they cancelled my account.
